Everyone....

I'm cutting my hair tonight.

YAY!!!

A Video for Becky

Jen and Tresca Go To Ogden

So, Jen and I went to Ogden this past weekend to attend a business conference.  Not only did we win for our Marketing Proposal, we also met some bikers, loaded up on complimentary conditioner and lotion, wandered 25th street, and left $1.00 with our names on it attached to the wall of some saloon....

i've cut my hair

NOT!!!

You like my new hair-do? I'm a throw back to the 50s, now I just need a man, a house, and loads of laundry....

i love him

I miss my jeep

Terribly.

Crazy sky

Aly wanted family pictures done the other day, and this is how the weather presented itself.

Thanks

Thanks alot

Family Picture

So, Stubots mission talk thing was this past Sunday. Mom arranged for a lady in the ward to come over and take a few family pictures.

Of course, Milo and I needed our very own family picture -- so check it out!

Let me just tell you that I still find it amazing that this child with this gorgeous hair came from me! Although, the vanity side of it says, "well, duh!"

No Need For Words -- Enough Said

i...i...i...

i am: back on my diet
i think: about going back to africa
i know: that i'm doing the right thing in raising milo
i want: milo and i to have the happiest time in any situation
i have: short hair and i want it long
i wish: i could take pictures all day long
i dislike: unkind people
i miss: my jeep
i fear: failure
i feel: comfortable with my life
i hear: music in my head all day long
i smell: baby powder -- great for the cleavage in this heat :)
i crave: lemons and water
i usually: cry when overwhelmed
i search: for the good in all situations
i wonder: if milo will ever know david
i regret: whenever i lose my patience
i love: milo and my family, photography, africa and it's people, the great U S of A, my job, the ocean, the smell of grass, choices, kind people and the smaller things in life
i care: about feelings
i always: will play The Sounds as loud as it will go
i worry: that milo will feel rejected - that is painful
i am not: going to miss a think in life
i remember: my first birthday cake, mom singing tula-baba to me, the beaches in africa, when tann and stu were born, always wanting a house with stairs, driving the VW bug into the garage door at 7 years old
i believe: in God
i dance: when i'm happy
i sing: without a tune
i don’t always: say thank you enough
i argue: with myself
i write: only to help me through tough times
i win: every day with my monster milo mania
i lose: my emotions at times
i never: thought i would become "one of THOSE girls"
i listen: not well enough
i don't understand: why we think too much -- it is what it is, love it!
i can usually be found: by calling my cell phone
i am scared: of tokoloshes, or putting my feet on the ground in the dark
i need: love
i forget: everything important and somehow remember the other
i am happy about: life
i now tag: you

Pregnant - phew, that's over

Look at this photo I found from my baby shower -- My Stomach!!!

Grandfather

This is my grandfather Andrew Miller - didn't have the pleasure of knowing him. He died when my mom was 15. He's buried in Scotland, I hope to visit him there one day.

My Go-Go

Look at my Go-Go (Zulu for Grandmother)

Isn't she pretty?

I miss her. She was a fun and cheeky old lady who would have just loved my little monster to bits!!

Red Hair

Wikipidia -

Approximately 1% to 2% of the human population has red hair. Red hair appears in people with two copies of a recessive gene on chromosome 16 which causes a change in the MC1R protein.

In order to get a red head, both parents need to carry "the" gene.

Ok - so, I've been dying my hair since I was 16 years old. Started with working at Albertson's in the summer bringing the grocery carts back in, bagging groceries and taking them out to the cars, and bringing the carts back in, bagging...you get the idea. I wanted to keep up with summer's past, and get as much sun as I could. So, I started putting Sun-In onto my roots and combing through. That stuff does work! I started getting golden locks.

Then, continued with the Blonde Ambition. About 4 years ago, I decided to go dark, 3 years ago, black.

I love walking around with Milo -- just about every single person will take a double look at us. I know what's going through their minds - Red Hair? Is he hers?

The point to this posting is this:

Who Knew I Had Red Hair? Check out this photo I took yesterday. I know, I need to color the roots, BUT, before I do, notice the red. It's only slight, but there it is!!

So, there you have it. I not only carry this recessive gene, I too have slight appearances of red.

Letting Go Of Anger

Hi ya'll

Thank you so much for all your kind messages and e-mails to my family and I. As you can tell, I take Milo VERY personally -- um, as I should right?!

Anyway, I posted on my blog out of pure frustration with our situation. I needed to vent. However, no matter my thoughts or opinions of David, he is still half of Milo - genetically.

I don't want Milo to grow up with negativity surrounding his life. I want Milo to know that he is loved and wanted by all of those that choose to be a part of him. One day, Milo will want to know more about David, and I choose to only tell him the postive things. If I bash David any more, I am afraid Milo will take it personally later on.

Maybe David came into my life for the sole purpose of giving me Milo, and for that, I will always thank him.

David's siblings (that know about Milo) have been very kind toward him. My heart goes out to this family that has a nephew/grand-child/cousin, so far away.

So, long story short, no more will I let David have control over my situation. Afterall, it's about Milo, not me.

Loving Milo

We all know that Jesus loves the little children, right?

Well, what if it were your own son?

Look, I’ve made my choices, but I have never hidden them, or lied about them.

The reason why we didn’t "connect" was because you were so willing to date me, yet when it came time to leaving your house in the morning, you would prefer me to climb out of the window, because your room-mates, you called them friends, are up and watching the Tabernacle Choir.

Seriously. If you can’t be honest with yourself, you can’t be honest with your friends. And are they really your friends if they will judge you for being you?

I told you that you cannot ever live your life as a lie, because the truth will ALWAYS be found. Well, in this instance, it was revealed by way of your son.

I’m sorry for not telling you about him until after his birth, but you were not his father. But, for some reason, God has given you to me, to give me this child. Thank you.

You say you are not ready to be a father. He wasn’t in your plan. Well, I was there too, but I chose to love. He deserves that. He didn’t ask to be brought into the world this way, that was our choice.

I can’t stand that you know about him, yet choose to turn the other way. Is it because you really can’t love him? Or are afraid that others won’t love you, since you have been hiding from yourself? I can’t believe that’s the type of man I made a child with.

Well, in that case, stay hidden. My son deserves a better role model than a man who is too cowardly to love the biggest, most wonderful part of himself.

What Would Jesus Do?

So, when Milo was about 3 months old, my sister contacted his fathers sister over MySpace.  It was a hard decision that had been toying in our minds for a long time, but, Tannith felt it was the right thing to do.  And I am so glad that she did.

It's sad to see however, how much disdain Milo's dad has about him.  The worst part is that he is requested his family to not have contact with Milo. 

Anyway, I want everyone to know about his dad, and how he is behaving.  If that means opening myself up more, then so be it.  I don't lie about what happened and I certainly won't protect his father in his lie.

Here is a link to hubpages.com  This is an article written by David's (Milo's dad) sister.

http://hubpages.com/hub/An-Open-Letter--To-Absent-Fathers

Update -- Where ya been?

Hi. I know, I'm terrible at updating this thing. Well, mainly because Milo and I just moved -- yup. Moved. I have my laptop with me, but, I don't have the wireless internet that I had when living at mom and dads.

Anyway, Milo had quite the time adjusting, it was sad. He had just finally started sleeping through the night. He was really weepy too. I think he missed the grand-parents, his uncle stubot and all the animals.

But, all is well and we are adjusting nicely. Here are some updated pictures of us:

One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue ???

Milo LOVES his reading time at night with his mommy. I have SO much fun reading to him. He will look at the book, look at me, back at the book, then back at me...

His favorite book right now is One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish -- good ol' Doctor Seuss!!

He is a nosy little professor.

How long can I use the excuse of "baby weight'?

Really.  I NEED to get serious about a diet now.  So, starting tomorrow, or the next day :), it's on!!!

Look.  Here's the thing, I've lost lots of weight before, 38lbs, however, this time I feel as if I have NO self control!  I just eat, eat and eat.

But, no more!  Well, eating ALL the time like I've been doing.  Plus, I wanna start running again.  I really love it.  Nothing is better than cruising along with my IPOD.  Most specifically, The Sounds singing me along....

So, stay tuned.  Let's see if I can do it!  Well, I'm just gonna have to...

Short Hair

Alright, I had been contemplating doing this for the last two years... Finally, got the guts to chop it all off!

Baby's Day Out

Milo's first Easter!  

That morning, we decided to join my mom and dad on a trip down to San Rafael Swell.  Milo was GREAT on the car ride down, slept the whole time.  But then, just as we arrived, he let me know that he was hungry.  HUNGRY.  While mom fed him, dad and I goofed around, much to the dismay of mom.  

After that, dad took us to see the "writings on the wall", and down to the river.

Then, his grand-dad decided to let him feel fresh snow melt for the first time....he was not happy about it.  :(

Growing Up Milo

Milo is growing up so quickly.  Today, we had to get him size 3 diapers, and 9 month old pajamas -- he's only 2 and a half months old!!  Mainly, it's because he is so long.  he's going to be so tall!

Anyway, of course, here are some new pictures of him that I just LOVE!

Oh, and meet Lamb-Chops.  Milo absolutely ADORES this stuffed animal.  He reaches for him and just hangs on to him.  I love it.

Cousins!!!

My cousins came to play last weekend.  We had SO much fun!  Grandma and Grand-dad moved a mattress into the family room.  I layed on the mattress while Adysen and Clayson jumped around me.  Brayden liked to climb over me too.  We had so much fun with Big Beary also.  I can't wait to have them come visit again!

Funny Grandparents

Every night I like to hang out on my grandma and grand-dads bed.  I even begin to ignore my mommy when she tries to get my attention.  But look how much they make me laugh!